Monday, June 28, 2010

It won't happen to me

It won’t happen to me! I remember in nursing school a very defining moment. It’s been over 20 years and I still remember it. We had a rotation in geriatrics and were going to be working in a nursing home for a period of time. The instructor was sharing information about what this experience would/could look like... She asked for a show of hands from us: who of us thought that we would end up in a nursing home? Not one of us 21 year olds thought it would happen to us. Isn’t that life? The teenager who thinks they won’t be one to get caught, the drinker who won’t get pulled over by the cop, you can fill in the blank.... we all think that it WON’T happen to US.

Don’t you think it is a little like that for the aging parent? We all think/hope/expect that we will be the one to die in our sleep peacefully and never endure a difficult diagnosis. We won’t burden anyone else and will always be self sufficient. We will be the strong one, the one who has everything in perfect order and control over the future. And we certainly won’t be the old person who has strong opinions or speaks negatively! We will age in perfect grace and never burden anyone and then when every piece of paper and relationship is in perfect order, we will die in our sleep. If your parent is suffering from some illness physically or mentally, I can almost guarantee, they did not think it would ever happen to them. SO what can we learn from these unexpected twists and turns in life? I think having patience while serving our parents, realizing that it could indeed be us someday. Also. applying “the golden rule”, by doing to others as we hope they will (or someone filling the job for me) do for me!

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